Genshin Impact is a free, open world, adventurous RPG with a lot of potential… and a lot of issues. Putting aside the questionable character design choices and predatory gatcha system for characters and weapons, it’s a goddamn unnecessary grind to level up characters that you “wish” for, all to keep people interested, and yet even that fails because it’s so goddamn grind-y!!
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TMM was a huuuge part of my middle and high school years, and basically kickstarted my future art career. I have read the manga and watched the anime so many times, and I can still draw the characters from memory. Naturally when the reboot was announced, I was pretty psyched, but that was dampened when the news of Mia Ikumi's passing broke. Luckily, or unluckily, depending on how you look at it, this new anime is starting off differently enough to distract me from getting too emotional, and I just want to get my thoughts out. THERE WILL BE SPOILERS FOR EPISODE ONE FOLLOWING THE READ MORE BREAK. READ AT YOUR OWN RISK.
But I am still alive. Living paycheck to paycheck like the true capitalist American dream intends.
But they will drag me kicking and screaming away from my passion. Or rather, my passion would rather go out kicking and screaming when I feel like I'm losing hope. Nothing kills creativity like cold, hard, American capitalism, lemme say that. My last post was so perfectly timed around the time I started my new job, and things have just been a mess since then. When you're working a varied schedule, in retail customer service, for minimum wage, with an overworked team, you tend to come home and just want to do nothing. It's exhausting. But I'm gonna try and use what time I have to do things.
I have been a human embodiment of anxiety the last couple weeks. My wrist has been hurting, so I've been avoiding drawing. My time was mostly taken up by video games, books, and anime, but because I wasn't "being productive," it really didn't help my anxiety. It did help with some inspiration building, though, and I think that's what I needed.
About a week after the last post was published, I had a realization that really kicked my butt to the curb. I wasn't able to draw the way I wanted, and I didn't have many ideas to even put on canvas. It set off something in me, and I've been dealing with some major depression since. I've been trying to brush it off, and instead focus on just gathering inspiration and practicing basics, but in the end, I haven't touched my tablet pen in almost a month.
Despite the fact that I am not currently employed, I still seem to lose track of the work I have been doing. In the process, I have been neglecting (or just straight-up forgetting) the things I wanted to keep up with (such as this blog... *cough*). However, I do have some news to share, as well as proofs for physical items I would like to have made in the future.
Today was my last Saturday, and the last day I will ever open the store I work at. It still hasn't quite set in yet, but let me say that I cannot freaking wait for this to be over.
I think 2020 really kicked a lot of people to the curb. I know, for me, it could have been worse. But things really went downhill in the last quarter; I lost two cats, and the holidays almost killed me at work (I work as a retail shipping associate). Since all that happened at the end of the year, it naturally followed me into the next year, so I’m still struggling to recover. And my first step is a huge thing that I wasn’t really planning to do for at least a couple months, but stuff happened and I’m quitting the job I’ve had for over two years.
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